Nintendo Freddy and Michael Bay

Alright, so I was pondering stupidity and its place in the survival of the species, when it dawned on me; Why is Nightmare on Elm Street (2010). being produced by Michael Bay? There are no car chases (hopefully), there shouldn’t be a ton of explosions, the sex, though gratuitous in these movies, is instantly replaced by the lesson that pre-marital fornication will get you fingered by the razor handed one; none of this adds up.
One might say, “Well, just because he’s producing it, doesn’t mean he’s directing It.” and though you are correct, why do you think directors, produce? In order to enlighten/in this case poison other generations of directors. It’s ok when, Robert Rodriguez, Quentin Tarantino, Guillermo Del Toro or Peter Jackson produces things because they have a style but they don’t let people in on their secrets. Even if they did, no one can get inside of their heads to rip them off; there is no formula. Michael Bay on the other hand, is all formula. Which is why Transformers does so well, it was a tailor made franchise for Bay. He gets to play with big toys and blow shit up; that’s all MB does, he’s known for blowing shit up. So, why does he need: Texas Chainsaw (Abercrombie & Fitch, commercial) Massacre, Friday (survivalist camp) the 13th and now my favorite child hood nightmare maker A Nightmare on Elm Street? Plus, how come we get 2 awesome Halloweens from Rob Zombie and now we have to suffer Michael Bay’s ego? Dudes…come on! Both directors (of all 3 movies) are music video directors. Shenanigans!
I mean, I’m going to see it and all…let me once again throw my support to the Human Centipede, a movie I haven’t seen, for gross out future of horror status. I can’t wait to see this vomit inducing gem. If you can’t scare their pants off, get ‘em a puke bucket, that’s what I say.